Why must you be so damn awkward. Not only did the people who market them think to make the weirdest most disturbing commercials ever, usually involving a vibrator going off in a ladies purse, but you decided to name them after animals. Oh yeah, putting a dolphin on my downstairs sounds real pleasurable. Also what the hell to the people who hear the vibrator in the purse in the commercials, you wouldn’t smile or look confused, everybody fucking knows it’s a vibrator. I would probably just point and say “SUCKS FOR YOU, BITCH, YOU AIN’T GETTIN LAID.” But seriously, vibrators, maybe be a little less ridiculous and I will consider purchasing one.
Frustratingly understimulated,
Me
